Delhi gang rape case: It’s time to wake up … everyone

Another year has come with new message, new hope and new possibilities. But it is not the joy of New Year that impelled me to take up my pen. It’s the pathetic suffering and unfortunate death of ‘Nirbhaya’ or ‘Damini’ whatever you call the 23-year old Delhi paramedic has left me in deep thought. What a society we are living in?

I would not salute her “sacrifice” because she did not choose to be tortured. I salute her brave heart because she wanted to live and fight.

I can not describe the feeling after reading the horrific story in detail about what was happened to her – it was shock, it was pain, it was fear, it was hatred, it was despair! It feels so bad that we could not bring her back to life. But the only ray of hope in this case was the COLLECTIVE NON-VIOLENT YET STRONG PROTEST OF COMMON PEOPLE irrespective of gender, age, status, profession, language and religion. Hope this is the beginning of the much needed CHANGE.

Yes, a thorough socio-psychological REFORM is needed to reduce crime against women. Death penalty is not the only solution.

Whenever a sexual assault or similar kind of crime happens against women I have seen many so called “educated” people pointing at the woman’s character. WHY? This is because it’s easier to do than to judge, stand up and protest. My appeal to them is – please stop thinking just like a MAN or a WOMAN, think like a HUMAN. The moment you raise your finger at the woman – Why she? What was she doing there? What is her background? – you actually encourage the criminal. And if she is a divorcee, if she lives alone, if she goes to the bar, if she returns late at night … things become even easier ( like in Park Street Rape Case). As if men have right to rape or do anything they want with a woman with such lifestyle!

Instead of protesting against a crime you are criticizing the victim even though you know deep in your mind that a “CRIME” has been committed.  If such criminals get away with what they have done there are chances they will repeat it. It can also encourage some other criminal minded people to try things like this. And this time it could be your dear one – your sister, your wife, your daughter.

Every time such heinous crime happens our “educated” and “respected” political leaders create controversies with comments that the way women dress up is the reason for such incidents and wash their hands off from any responsibilities. What the hell? My question is did “Nirbhaya” or other thousands of rape/molestation victims from ordinary middle class, poor families in city or in village dress scantily or provocatively? Or even if they do, does it justify such crime in an educated, advancing society? Then such incidents would be in highest number in Europe and America. But in concrete the scenario is actually opposite.

I know some people would restrict their daughters, sisters and wives to go outside or return late at night, or dressing up as they like. But that is never a solution. If it was, the TALIBAN REGIME would be the best place to live. They would have built up the most disciplined and safest society.

And can you guarantee that women are safe at home? NO, because… Dombivali rape case where father and brother arrested for raping a teenage girl is unfortunately nothing new.

And MEN if you ask your sister, your wife, your daughter or your female friends you’ll rarely find one who has not experienced stalking, teasing or minor sexual harassment especially in their teens.

So, it’s time to wake up. It’s time to stop blaming the victim when a ‘rape’ occurs. It’s time to stop make them feel that what happened to them was their fault. It’s time to teach our boys to take girls as human beings and not just a ‘woman’. And say NO to such perversion.

I am not sure if such evils can be completely eliminated from our society. From government’s part stricter law, prompt judicial action and harsher penalty in such cases is required.

But I believe education in grass root level, more coeducation schools, honest initiative from elders and teachers to stop discrimination between boys and girls, encourage friendly interactions between young boys and girls from the very beginning and of course teaching girls to protect themselves can reduce occurrence of atrocities against women.  It is better to heal the wound from within than keep it covered for protection.

5 thoughts on “Delhi gang rape case: It’s time to wake up … everyone

  1. It’s been 3 years to the horrible incident and forget about changes, rather such incidents have been on the rise. It seems like men have learned the wrong lesson from the Nirbhaya incident. And I completely agree with you Moon, it’s time women learn to say NO. The only way I see a solution to this is education, for both men and women. In India, people struggle hard to meet two square meals a day. They don’t really care for issues like women empowerment and fighting for justice. I admit that these cannot be any excuse to the horrible crime but these are serious causes, if not immediate ones. Our social and economic problems are so deep-rooted that it seems at times near impossible to prevent such incidents. We can argue over women liberation but can we change the psyche overnight? What we can do, of course, ensure speedy trials and severe punishment, even if the convict is a juvenile.

    I second your concern when you say you doubt whether it is possible to eliminate such evil completely from our society. The administration (no matter who’s in power) is so blinded by its petty political and financial gains that it hardly has the time to adopt reforms to fight social evils. Got too carried away with my comment 🙂 Good post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s not just about the administration. We need to change our mindset first. In our society it is the rape victim who is questioned, humiliated, and further victimized because of our taboos and stereotypical thinking. The way our society treats a rape victim also needs to be changed.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Not that rapes does not happen everywhere but what makes rape different in India is the government does not seem to do anything to protect their women. Someday I want to see your country but I have a fear of being sexually harassed or disrespected as heard in the news. Reason why I am very interested in your blog, I want to know more about your society and how you feel about your country. Thank you for your voice and speaking out.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes…this is something most women fear while traveling in India. But you know India is avast and diverse country. There is diversity in geography, language, religion,culture and food. Not all places are same. For example, states like Goa, Rajasthan, Sikkim, and Cities like Mumbai, and Bangalore are safe places for tourist if someone is not extremely adventurous. Southern states such Kerala and Pondicherry are also nice places as I have known. So, if you really want to visit India you can start with these places first and the gradually expand your itinerary. And I can assure you if there is bad people there are good people too. Many women in India are now traveling solo or in group. You can start with some all women group initially. Once you get to know the people things will be easier.


  3. @Moon, great write-up. You have raised valid points here. Hopefully, this new year would see the rise of human beings.

    [quote]I know some people would restrict their daughters, sisters and wives to go outside or return late at night, or dressing up as they like. But that is never a solution. ,[/quote]

    These things are not by any means limited to anything. People who are not afraid to commit crime in public places, can raid homes and commit similar crimes.


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